Dec 12, 20243 min read

How to Write Your Wedding Vows: A Comprehensive Guide

Your wedding vows are one of the most personal and heartfelt parts of your big day. They’re your opportunity to express your love, promises, and commitment in your own words. Whether you’re a poet at heart or feel more comfortable keeping it simple, this guide will walk you through the process of writing vows that feel authentic and meaningful.

Photo by Jesse James Wedding Photography

How to Write Your Wedding Vows
Tips for Writing Your Wedding Vows
Wedding Vow Examples
Answer These Questions Before You Get Started
Frequently Asked Questions When Writing Your Vows

How to Write Your Wedding Vows

Writing your wedding vows can feel daunting, but breaking it into manageable steps makes the process much easier. Here’s how to get started:

Reflect on Your Relationship: Think about your journey as a couple. What brought you together, and what has kept your bond strong?
Decide on a Tone: Discuss with your partner whether you’ll keep your vows romantic, humorous, traditional, or a mix of all three.
Outline Key Points: Include how you met, what you love about your partner, and your promises for the future.
Write a Draft: Start with a rough draft. Don’t worry about making it perfect right away; focus on getting your thoughts down.
Edit and Polish: Refine your wording, ensuring it flows well and is easy to speak aloud.
Practice: Rehearse your vows multiple times to feel comfortable delivering them during the ceremony.

Tips for Writing Your Wedding Vows

Be Authentic: Speak from the heart and stay true to yourself.
Keep It Concise: Aim for 1-2 minutes to keep your vows impactful.
Avoid Inside Jokes: Make sure your vows resonate with your partner and your guests.
Incorporate Specifics: Highlight specific traits or moments that make your relationship unique.
Set Time Aside: Don’t rush the process. Give yourself time to write and revise.

Wedding Vow Examples

Here are a few examples to inspire your own vows:

Romantic: “Today, I vow to love you not only for who you are but for who I am when I’m with you. From the moment we danced under the stars on our first date, I knew you were my forever. I promise to always hold your hand during scary movies and to share my fries with you, even when I don’t want to.”

Humorous: “I promise to love you even when you insist on watching the same TV show for the fourth time. I vow to support you in all your hobbies, even the ones you pick up and drop within a week. You’re my favorite person to laugh with, and I can’t wait to see what adventures we’ll stumble through together.”

Traditional: “I take you to be my partner in life, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health. From the moment we said goodbye at the airport during our long-distance days, I knew our love was unbreakable. I vow to cherish you and walk beside you for all the days of my life.”

Answer These Questions Before You Get Started

What do you love most about your partner?
How has your relationship grown over time?
What challenges have you overcome together?
What do you admire about your partner?
What promises are most important for your future together?
How does your partner make you feel?

Answering these questions will give you a solid foundation for your vows.

Frequently Asked Questions When Writing Your Vows

Q: How long should my vows be?A: Aim for 1-2 minutes, which is typically around 150-250 words.

Q: Should we share our vows with each other beforehand?A: This is up to you. Some couples prefer to keep them a surprise, while others ensure they’re aligned in tone and length.

Q: Can I include quotes or song lyrics in my vows?A: Absolutely! Just make sure they’re meaningful and enhance your message.

Q: What if I get emotional during my vows?A: It’s perfectly okay! Emotions make your vows genuine. Keep tissues handy and take a deep breath if needed.

Q: Should I memorize my vows?A: Memorizing can be impressive, but it’s okay to read from a card. The delivery matters more than memorization.

Writing your wedding vows is a deeply personal process that allows you to celebrate your love story. Take your time, speak from the heart, and enjoy the journey of crafting words that will mark the beginning of your married life together.

Photos: Jesse James Wedding Photography

Venue: Burlap and Bells in Wisconsin